Did you know what you wanted to achieve before you started your happiness journey?
I wanted what I saw on television. The perception of what happy people look like. A clean white smile, blue jeans, white vest, great car, and a trophy wife. This was my vision when I set out on my mission to be happy. But what I didn’t know is that my vision would not play out this way. How I had imagined it.
The road to happiness has been hard, damp, painful, thrilling, tormenting, uncertain, vicious, full of doubters, setbacks, and self-doubt. I thought once I had a vision of what I wanted it would not take long to get to the other side. But how I was wrong.
Why it takes time to achieve peace
Happiness doesn’t mean having all you desire. The blue jeans, or white smile, does not Blue Tick it as verification that you are happy. Achieving peace can be very different from your preliminary vision. Yes, I would have loved my vision to be a carbon copy of what I envisioned but happiness once you find it can be totally different. Not fabricated.
Looking at my peace today. I am happy for my health, for taking care of myself, stopping my bad habits, helping others, making a difference, leaving a mark in my field, giving joy to my family, living my dream, and building my finances to pay my bills for months, before I worry. Should the well dry up.
This is my peace. Living a life chosen by me. Working on it daily. Learning and asking for help. Doing what I love, getting frustrated when things don’t go my way. Though the frustration is different. There’s a difference in how you react to doing what you love, and doing what you don’t love. Peace is very important. But happiness and loving yourself comes at a cost. You have to let go of a lot of exciting things which harm your life.
I call these life destroying joys silent killers like High Blood Pressure or hypertension which causes heart disease. You don’t see it when your fun is destroying your life until it’s too late. Detecting what builds and destroys your life is very important. I don’t want to be a person who looks back and sheds a tear because I had the opportunity to fix myself but I chose to do things which weren’t right for my life.
Happiness is very important. If you need to take drastic measures to find peace, as long as they don’t harm other people or yourself, do it. Your actions may hurt other people if it means breaking away… but do it. The Coronavirus social distancing rules taught me that moving away from bad elements prevents them from sticking on you.
If you have rules in your life you have a greater chance of succeeding in whatever you pursue. It takes discipline to be happy. You become grounded, knowledgeable, and enlightened. Which helps you manage your expectations and you don’t fall victim to peer pressure.
I’m far from done chasing my happiness. But at least I’m not where I started and my peace is grounded on lessons I have learned. Tears I have shed. Friends I gained and lost. Wisdom received and teachings shared with others. As you grow in your peace you learn to calm down and appreciate what you have, big and small. You enjoy television without being envious of what people portray to be symbols of happiness.