Why it’s important, what healing means, and how to do it.

Very few of us, if any, go through life without experiencing some degree of trauma. This trauma becomes not only a burden but a responsibility. It is, for each of us, our own responsibility to process and heal our trauma. For unhealed trauma has a domino effect, it passes on, often without intention. 

Some people chose to hold on to their trauma for various, I would deem, selfish reasons. It becomes an excuse for behaviour that affects themselves or others negatively. It also becomes a part of their identity. You may be thinking to yourself that the writer of this text has no idea of what real trauma is like and this is all a rather pompous assertion. Well, I can assure you – I have carried trauma in my body and in my mind for far too long. This is an epiphany of my own, that I must overcome the pain stored in my body, tormenting my mind and being. Why? Because I love those around me deeply and no longer wish to burn them with my sorrows. 

I, too, have made my trauma a part of my identity, made it something to excuse my addictive tendencies, I have allowed it to assimilate through my entire being. My body has been tense for years and my mind has been turbulent. I am always conjuring up ways to run away. 

Healing trauma

Now, I have taken up the rather gruelling and audacious task of healing my own trauma. I continue to live with those who have deep wounds, depression and anxiety, which weighs me down beyond words. If you’re currently in your 20s or 30s, you may relate to the pain of watching your own parent flood the house with their woe. For, the notion of trauma or the idea that it is something that can be healed is rather foreign to the generation before us. They had very little to no access to competent psychology. Psychology is one of, if not, the newest sciences, constantly being updated and changed. I refuse to put blame on anyone for it deflects the need to take this responsibility as my own. They do not choose to change, but I do. 

Let’s outline what I mean by ‘healing’. I seek to become impervious to mundane quarles, of which I currently love becoming a part of. I seek to remain calm in moments of frustration or irritation. I want to redirect my perspective and mental focus on building my future and not the negative aspects of my present life. I seek to feel calm, deep in my body – I don’t want to be chasing my own tail everyday, anymore. I want to become grateful, present and loving. 

How do I plan to achieve this? 

1. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy: Catching myself in negative thoughts and almost, ‘manually’ or consciously directing them to something of higher value. 
2. Somatic exercises such as walking and yoga. 
3. Redefining my identity – garnering self-respect and a calm composure.
4. Breathing techniques. When children cry, you will notice they gasp twice and breathe out – this is the body’s way of eliminating CO2 very quickly. The more CO2 you get out, the more oxygen you get in. 
5. Writing. I find documenting brief moments of insight very therapeutic.
6. Reading. Reading is the fastest way to improve your perspective. 
7. Having fun! But not too much fun… 
8. Cultivating presence – for more often than not, I live a blessed life. The mind often makes me overlook the moments of peace I do actually have. 

Signs of Depression and Anxiety

Understanding the signs of depression and anxiety is crucial for early intervention and support. Both conditions can manifest in various ways, affecting emotions, thoughts, and physical health. Here are some key signs to be aware of:

Signs of Depression

1. Persistent Sadness: A lingering feeling of sadness, emptiness, or hopelessness that does not seem to improve over time.
2. Loss of Interest: A marked decrease in interest or pleasure in activities once enjoyed, including hobbies, social interactions, or work.
3. Changes in Appetite: Significant weight loss or gain, or changes in eating patterns, such as overeating or loss of appetite.
4. Sleep Disturbances: Difficulty falling asleep, staying asleep, or sleeping excessively – all of which can exacerbate feelings of fatigue and irritability.
5. Fatigue: Persistent tiredness or lack of energy, making everyday tasks feel overwhelming or unmanageable.
6. Feelings of Worthlessness: Incessant criticism of oneself, feeling overly guilty, or having trouble recognizing one’s value.
7. Difficulty Concentrating: Trouble focusing on tasks, making decisions, or remembering things, which can impact work and daily life.
8. Physical Symptoms: Unexplained aches and pains, headaches, or digestive problems that cannot be attributed to other medical conditions.
9. Withdrawal: Pulling away from friends and family, avoiding social situations, or a lack of communication with loved ones.
10. Thoughts of Death: Recurring thoughts of death or suicide, or a desire to escape from life’s challenges.

Signs of Anxiety

1. Excessive Worrying: Constantly feeling anxious or worrying excessively about various aspects of life, including work, health, or relationships.
2. Restlessness: A feeling of being on edge, unable to relax, or experiencing an inner sense of unease.
3. Irritability: Increased agitation or irritability that is disproportionate to the situation, affecting personal and professional relationships.
4. Physical Symptoms: Symptoms such as a racing heart, sweating, trembling, fatigue, or muscle tension can be common, often leading to further discomfort.
5. Avoidance Behaviors: Actively avoiding situations or places that trigger anxiety, resulting in limitations on daily life.
6. Panic Attacks: Episodes of intense fear or discomfort that peak within minutes, accompanied by physical symptoms like shortness of breath, heart palpitations, or dizziness.
7. Difficulty Sleeping: Challenges in falling asleep, staying asleep, or experiencing restless sleep due to racing thoughts.
8. Feeling Detached: Experiencing a sense of unreality or detachment from oneself or surroundings, often as a coping mechanism.
9. Concentration Issues: Difficulty concentrating or focusing on tasks, often interrupted by anxious thoughts.
10. Overthinking: Engaging in excessive rumination or overanalyzing situations, often leading to a cycle of anxiety.

Recognizing the signs of depression and anxiety is an essential step in addressing these issues. If you or someone you care about is experiencing these symptoms, seeking professional help is vital. Early intervention can lead to effective coping strategies and a path toward healing.

Conclusion

Healing trauma. It is our responsibility for taming the fire within before we start fires in others. No matter how great the fire or how painful the burn was – you are capable of overcoming and transmuting any burden. For we are souls, we have a body  – the body might not be able to, but there are no limits to what the soul can achieve.